Life is meant to be simple, but often we are the one who make it complicated. As a result, many people are struggling to live a happy and victorious life. Instead, they live a life like a roller coaster rides, with moods and emotions swinging up and down depending on the environment.
Have you ever lost your hope in life at some points of your life, or blame the society for the misery that you are going through? You may be at a low place of your life and ask question on why you are not getting the same good treatment from others when you have been doing good to others, helping people in needs and have always been a good person?
You may have a lot of whys type of questions in your mind. Why must this happen to me? Why is this world so unfair to me? The list of whys question can go on and on. I don’t have the answers to this, but one thing I know for sure, is that your circumstances are not going to improve by dwelling on these questions.
Today, I am going to share with you 5 Life Skills for a Victorious Living, and I hope that my humble sharing may address some of your personal matters and help to set you free from your bondage in life. I would love to put a simile back on to your face.
The 5 Life Skills that I would be sharing are:
- Never Give Up Hope
- Be Resilient and Gritty
- The Power of Right Believing
- Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle
- Things That Really Matters in Life
Never Give Up Hope
Don’t give up hope just because you have a bad moment in your life. Keep going forward regardless of the circumstances. Remember this, your life story doesn’t end here. Life is never a bed of roses; we all know this. Nothing is worse than this: when a person totally loses hope and no longer have any desire to live.
In the midst of challenges in life and probably you are feeling the heats of some issues in your life now. But be of good cheers, what is done is done, and what is gone is gone.
What you can learnt from all these is learning how to let go and move on. Never let your past dictate how your future will be. The quicker you get over the past mistakes or unhappy events, the healthier you will become to yourself.
You are stronger than you know about yourself. Your soul has the capacity and resiliency to preserver and endure hardship that is way beyond what you can think or imagine. Therefore, don’t let what you see limit yourself, be courageous and break free from all the imaginary barriers that are probably non-existence in the first place.
Many of the challenges exists only in the mind and may not be a real obstacle.
You are as strong as you think within your heart. The bible says: “For as he thinks within himself, so he is.”
If you think you cannot do it, you are right. If you think you are going to make it, you are not wrong either. Whatever you say to yourself in your heart, you are what you think. Therefore, the first life skill in life for a victorious living is to get your hopes up even before you start to work on the other skills.
I like what Bryant McGill says in this book “Simple Reminders” that The number one skill in life is not giving up. You can get a copy of his book “Simple Reminders” by clicking on the link below.
Be Resilient and Gritty
Grit was defined as “perseverance and passion for long-term goals” by psychologist Angela Duckworth. You can read more about this in her book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance. Enjoy her TED talk about Grit below to understand more about Grit.
Adversity is a fact of life. Resilience is that ineffable quality that allows you to be knocked down by life and come back at least as strong as before. Rather than letting difficulties or failure overcome you, you will find a way to rise up and carry on.
When life give you a lemon, use it to make a lemonade. When you are downcast, never think about the past, it may bring tears. Don’t think too much into the future, it brings fears. Live this moment, one day at a time with resilience and grittiness, it will bring smile and cheers.
And it is during the period of testing and trials that you grow. As you overcome one obstacle after another and do not give up, one day when you look back you will be amazed how much you have achieved and improved.
That’s how your resilience is built up, you don’t inherit it just by reading some motivational or self-help books. And in the process of going through the test, you also become grittier and will be able to withstand the next blow that life would bring on you. The key is this, without the presence of such challenges, you will not get to train your muscles on resiliency and grittiness.
Stress may not be always bad; it can also be a motivator. It can be essential to survival. Just like water, it can carry a boat, but water can also capsize a boat. We just need to know and manage our stress so that we recognize when our body is in toxic stress so that we can quickly move out of the “danger zone”.
Once we are aware that we are in the “danger zone” we can make stress work for us by re-conceptualizing the problem and turning it into something constructive. You can read more about this in the book by Dr. Caroline Leaf called Think, Learn, Succeed.
Have you ever felt like you are out of control? Self-Control is strength. Calmness is mastery. You have to work towards the goal where your mood doesn’t shift based on the actions of someone else.
Don’t allow others to control and hold you as a hostage. If you have a weakness that others know that you will go mad whenever they activate that “switch”, then they will try to turn on that switch whenever they want to control you. Break free from this weakness and don’t be a slave to anyone just because of this weak spot.
This is the second life skill that all of us have to learn to master in order to live a victorious life. With resiliency and grittiness, we will be able to ride above the waves of challenges and trials of life.
The Power of Right Believing
Nothing you have that is good at the moment is because of luck or chance. It is all because of God’s grace and favor. Similarly, nothing that is bad that happened to you now is due to bad luck or chance. You got to believe that these things are temporal and will pass away.
Believing the right things is the key to a victorious life. In THE POWER OF RIGHT BELIEVING, Joseph Prince, international bestselling author and a leading voice in proclaiming the gospel of grace, unveils seven practical and powerful keys to help you find freedom from every fear, guilt, and addiction.
Let me give you an example. Let say you have a friend and you owed him an amount of one million dollars due to a failed business venture. As a debtor, you would want to avoid seeing this friend of yours whenever you are still indebted to him, am I right? What if one day you have another friend who come to know about your plight and paid off your debts without your knowledge, would you still try to avoid this person whom you owed money “previously” when you see him on the road? I would think so, because you are still debt conscious and thought that you have unpaid debt to him despite the fact that your debt has been cancelled!
So, this is an example of not knowing, or not believing the right thing. How many of us are like that? We made ourselves miserable due to our wrong belief over certain thing. Have you ever condemned yourself and believed that you deserved to be punished for the bad things that you or your parents have done? For those who of you who have terminal illness, do you resigned to fate and believe that the illness is a result of generation curses passed down to you from your ancestors? Nothing can be further from the truth; this is the lies of the devil.
Generation curse is a false teaching. Neither should you believe that bad things happen to you because of what you’ve done in the past. Believer right and you will live right. But when you believe right, many of our life problems and issues would automatically be nullified. I would encourage you to get this book on “The Power of Right Believing” and in this book, Pastor Joseph Prince will be able to explain to you in greater details on how you can have a victorious life when you correct your belief.
Do you believe that you are a born loser just because you have been hearing such comments spoken to you since young? Do you believe that you are useless and will never make it to the top just because you are not able to perform well in your career or school? If you constantly have such thoughts, you will not be able to live a victorious life because you are believing the wrong thing.
The right belief is that you first need to know your true identity. Let me assure you, you are one of a kind, a master piece, fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. You are loved by the Father God, and you are His beloved child. Once you have this right belief, you will be able to have that divine hope to know that the favor of God will lead you to success and prosperity. Jesus said in John 10:10
God did not create you and to let you live in misery, nor to create a born loser or a useless person. Believe in your true identity and this will be the starting point for you to live a victorious life.
Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle
To live a victorious life, another key factor is to remain healthy. What good is it if you are successful in many areas but to not have the health to enjoy the fruits of your labor?
Health does not always come from medicine or eating well. When I say that you need to maintain a healthy lifestyle, I am not referring to eating well nor is it about doing sufficient exercise and work outs etc.
Most of the time, it comes from the peace of mind, peace in your inner being or heart, peace in the soul. Often our body breaks down due to stress and worries. Therefore, when I say to maintain a healthy lifestyle, I am referring to a healthy emotional lifestyle instead of the things you do outwardly because you will be in great health on the outside when your inner soul prospers.
When your inner health is healthy, it will show up in your physical. The opposite is true, if your inner man is sickly and weak, it will also translate into sickness in your physical body. Our body cells are very intelligent, if they sense the signal from the brain that its master is full of stress and worries, or emotionally unstable and have the tendency to punish himself.
Those body cells will obey and say to each other that our master wants to punish himself, so let’s obey him. That’s when our body cells start to deteriorate and sickness such as cancerous cells starts to form.
The other lesson you can learn in life is how to master the art of remaining calm. Be quick to listen, but slow to speak or react. Live the let-go life and naturally you will find yourselves in the realm of victory. In LIVE THE LET-GO LIFE, Joseph Prince shows you how to beat stress and anxieties that come with the everyday demands and pressures of modern living. Keep your heart merry, because a merry heart is good medicine to the soul and to the whole body.
Next, you may need to beware of what are the things that will disturb your inner peace. The most common one is unforgiveness. This is probably the most common cause for many people to lose their joy, fall sick or die before their time.
Unforgiveness is one of the main culprits for robbing you of your happiness. It’s quite sad to know that there are people who harbor resentment for an incident that happen many years ago, and continue to hold the grudges against a person even if that person had already passed on. And for many years, this unforgiveness never cease to poison and torment them day and night and rob them of their happiness.
The urge to hold on to unforgiveness is usually because you feel that the other party is in the wrong and you have been victimized. Instead of questioning whether the other party deserve your forgiveness, just let it go and move on in life. Unforgiveness is like a poison that will immobilize you, make you feel lethargic, restless and sad. You may feel good holding on to it, but it is like a toxic that will contaminate your life.
Unforgiveness is also the root cause for many health-related diseases. It may not be explained scientifically, but studies have shown that many diseases are induced by unforgiveness due to the stress and pressure of the bitterness put on the person.
So, for your health sake, forgive. Who is the gainer when you forgive the person who had hurt you? You may think that it’s that person you are forgiving, but no, you are actually benefiting yourself more than the other person. You will feel happier and healthier when you’re not filled with resentment in your heart, which will also pave the path for you to live a victorious life.
Things That Really Matters in Life
Is your life priority being set on the right things? Do you spend a lot of your times focusing on things that really matters in life, or are you letting your mind filled up with things that are of little value?
For example, what shall you wear, what shall you eat are things that do not matters in life. Are you spending a lot of your time acquiring the latest electronic gadgets or always busy chasing the juicy news in the social media?
Do you spend all your energies and times on your career, and working over-time on weekends instead of spending time with your family and love ones? Are you overly worrying about the future instead of focusing on the present? Do you still hold on to the resentment of the wrongs that other people did to you 10 years ago?
If you seriously take stock on how you spend your time and the things that you give priority to, many of us probably are guilty of giving weight to things that don’t really matters in life. And these are the things that deny you of your rights to be victorious in life.
Take away all these distractions on things that doesn’t matter in life, and give priority and weight to things that matters in life, I assure you that you are one step closer to living a victorious life. Strictly speaking, it may not necessarily be the things that you do that make you victorious, but often it is the absence of those things that don’t matters in life that help you to be more victorious.
Take organic apple as an illustration. It’s not that organic apple has better nutrients than the non-organic one. Rather, the truth is that organic apple is better due to the absence of insecticides that make it a healthier choice, do you get it now?
So, what then are the examples of things that matter in life? I have a few for you, though they are not conclusive as this is not a one size fits all kind of checklist. Every one of us is unique, what matters to me may not matters to you, but these are the things that I feel matters to the masses.
- Faith in God. Believe in the almighty and the favor of God in your life because believe right matters.
- Spending time with your family and loves one. Don’t wait till they are gone then start to regret.
- Work hard, but not at the expense of neglecting your family and health.
- Forgiving others, letting go of past grievances. It’s silly to hold on to grudges and make yourself miserable.
- Believe in yourself, love yourself and take good care of yourself. It is not a selfish act if you take good care of your well-being, it’s an act of survival.
- Self-improvement and continual learning. Keep learning, this should not stop just because you graduated from any educational institutions.
- Doing random acts of kindness to those in need. Be a good example for others to follow.
- Physical exercise and sleep well.
- Personal time alone. With the busy schedule in a complex world, give yourself some quality time to mediate. This activity is also about giving yourself a private space for personal reflection.
- Set short term goals that you can achieve in the near term
You may think that what does doing only the things that matters going to help me with a victorious life? Friend, remember what I say just a moment ago. It’s the absence of certain things that don’t matters in life that help you to be more victorious. So by focusing and doing only the things that matters in life, hopefully you will spend less time on things that do not matters. And by doing only the things that matters in life, you will find your life more fulfilling and meaningful.
I hope this last life skills rings a bell in you and motivate you to set your priorities right in life and spur you towards a successful and victorious living.
These 5 life skills that I shared are by no means exhaustive, and some may or may not be applicable to you as this is not a one size fits all kind of advice. You may also already have other life skills that work well for you, then continue to use them. If it works for you, great. I just wish that my little sharing is able to bring some encouragement and cheers to my readers. May God bless you.
Thank you and have a nice day.